Empower Your Child with Intention Setting

Setting positive intentions for the day is another important habit to make part of your morning routine. This practice should be established as something that is done in accordance with a regular routine and not squeezed in wherever it might fit into your morning. For example, you might set intentions everyday while having breakfast together, or while traveling to school. Or you might prefer to have intention setting be an activity that is not associated with any other activity. Some people like to give intention setting a feeling of sacredness by incorporating elements of ritual such as candle lighting. It’s not important how you do it. What’s important is that you do it consistently so that it becomes a habit.

If possible, I recommend that daily intention setting be something the whole family does together. While the children are still learning the process, it might be a good idea for you to go first so that you can model how to state an intention and engage in visualization. As each family member has their turn, the other members can support an individual’s intention by joining in with visualizing it.

Now, the real important question, and the one that stumps many parents, is: What kinds of daily intentions are good to encourage children to set? It can be a challenge to inspire children to have faith in their own power to create and to manifest their dreams while, at the same time, keeping it real. The reality is that we don’t always get exactly what we desire. One of the key things about manifestation is letting go of outcomes. When you are able to let go of outcomes and be open to receiving what you are envisioning or something better, you will often be surprised by something showing up that is far better than what you imagined. It’s important to understand that much of what we desire represents strategies that we have come up with to meet more core desires. For example, in my children’s book, Gracey’s Desire, Gracey, whose core desires are for love and belonging, creates a vision of a particular home and family that she wants to manifest. What shows up for Gracey doesn’t look exactly like what she had envisioned but it fulfills her core desires in a way that is better than what she had imagined.

A good way to guide children to focus on core desires is to begin by asking the question, “What good do you want to invite into your life today?” It may help, especially with younger children, to give them a list of some examples, such as: Once they have decided what kind of good they want to invite in, have them state it as an affirmation such as, “Today I am inviting the goodness of ____ into my life.” Or, it could be said as simply as, “Today I will have (or, experience) ____.” Next, have them spend some time imagining themselves having that experience in their day. Ask, “How do you imagine having ___ in your day?” Now we’re getting into the realm of strategies. For example, your child might say, “I see myself experiencing joy when I score a goal.” Younger children may need you to lead them through a guided visualization, while older children may prefer to have their own private visualization. And, to reinforce letting go of outcomes in terms of strategies, always end by saying, “I am so grateful for this experience or something better.”

For very young children, it is best to stick with just one general intention for every day, such as being happy. You, or they, could draw a picture of them with a big happy face. When the time comes for your intention setting routine, simply take out the picture and say something like, “Here is Sarah feeling happy. How does Sarah feel today?” Then you can vision with the child as you approach various junctures of the day such as, “I see happy Sarah having breakfast. I see happy Sarah sitting in her car seat. I see happy Sarah playing at the park,” etc.

Teens can engage in setting intentions for their state of being. This is significant because true success is more about who we are than what we have. To support teens in setting this type of intention, you can provide a list of possibilities such as those included in the following chart. Have your teens choose one to three traits that they intend to express that day. Then ask them, “How do you intend to be today in order to create a great day?” They can answer the question by affirming, “Today, I intend to be… happy, helpful, courageous, truthful,” etc. Some teens may prefer to engage in this activity on their own, but encourage them to share their intentions with you so that you can support them by visualizing them living out their intentions throughout their day.
To complete your morning intention setting routine, everyone could write or draw their intentions on an index card to be carried with them as a reminder throughout the day. (Teens sometimes like to write theirs on their hands or inner arms).

The time it will take to set intentions in this manner will vary and depend upon the number of family members participating. Consistency is the key. To develop life-long habits it is important for you to create a morning routine that allows for the time you will need to do this. New routines can be challenging in the beginning, but remember, once they have been established, it will likely be the children who insist upon following them. Your commitment to this routine for your family will demonstrate to your children the value of setting positive daily intentions and help them to establish a habit that will empower them to create happy successful lives.

Do you have any intention setting routines of your own that you'd like to share? Or, if you try any that I've suggested, I'd love to hear your feedback.

Next posting will be more about core desires and how to create vision boards with children.